Sleepless Nite!! STRIKE again!!

Assalamualaikum wbt
long time no see
missing me??
i'm not in the mood of updating blog that's why i keep being a loner
xtaula nape, nak kate byk keje sgt pon tak, mebi emosi a lil bit chaotic kot
btw Alhamdulillah i'm officially graduated my diploma
it was a month already
xsempat nak habaq maii
syukurlah dpt grad da diploma, there's another phase waiting for me, more crucial, my first degree
result tuk intake degree mebi dlm bln 7 kot, sooo menternak lemak & menanam anggur la nampaknya
intake sal blaja ni nati aku update again on the next entry
actually semenjak 2,3 minggu ni i hardly sleep at nite
dunno why????
as the consequence, subuh aku asyik subuh dinosaur jer, MasyaAllah
not everyday but sometimes lorhhh
alarm dah dua dekat kepala, sblom tdo mesti check dulu whether i set it up already or not
bngun je idokkk, da penat melalak, alarm aku pon senyap jela, empunya badan still got carried away with nice dream
adeihhhh
i tried my best to get rid of this habit
mase blaja dulu senang je nak bgun, org x kejut pon aku bleh je bgn awal sendiri
hmmmmmmm :'(
i think this might be because of i'm thinking too much of certain things

org xtau ape benda yg duk maen dlm kpala otak kita ni
though if we tell to other people, they hardly understand it
kalau aku da start xboleh tdo mulala kepala merayau terbang da sampai Capetown dahh
i always committing my own mistake before i sleep
so that's why i can't sleep due of my thinking to solve it
bler da aku prepare tempat tdo, turned light off, set alarm
i'll start to reflect on my ownself
amal aku pada Allah dah cukup ke?? sembahyang aku td da cukup khusyuk?? slalu je ulang buat kesalahan yg same, Allah still terima ke taubat aku?? xderhaka ke perbuatan aku kat maa ngn abah?? byk dah ke jasa yg aku da bg kat diorg??
all these thing keep playing in my mind
persoalan sal membe2 lg la serabut kepala klu nak pikir
xtaula knapa

but people,
don't expect more from cause i might disappointing you
i'm still not a good slave or ummah to Him
i'm still not a good child to both of my parent
i'm totally not a good friend to all of you
i'm trying my best to fix myself to become a better person, In Shaa Allah

p/s: to those yg penah trase ati ngn aku, mintak maaf byk2, i won't bothering you anymore


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